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Hey peeps

I'm moving my blog site to Tumblr, so check it out HERE. It'll be way better.

Thanks!

Jen

Aigburth times are changin'

There have been so many changes for the Aigburth house lately. The girls on the first floor will be all moved out by September 1st, Angela is moving to the second floor, Liz went to the Ukraine, Kate got engaged... and all of the goodbyes would be extra sad if me and my third floor (called the penthouse, oddly only by me though) didn't have plans for the future too. Since I will be moving out mid-December to prepare for my last semester of school in Costa Rica, my good friend Beth will be taking my place in the house. I'm very excited because until then, she's going to move in and we'll be roommates for a few months. Never in my life have I had a roommate, nor have I wanted one, but Beth is one of the few girls in the world that I have no hesitations rooming with.

Since Beth is moving in around September 5th, I started to thoroughly clean and de-clutter the apartment so that it would like as nice and fresh for her arrival as it was for mine. I even started boxing up my decorations, pictures, and other miscellaneous items so that gradually the apartment will start to feel less like mine and more like hers. Literally everything in the apartment is mine except for two bar stools and a crappy TV table. Moving in was so quick and fun, but I can tell that moving out will be slow and laborious. This apartment IS mine, I feel it in my bones, like it was made for me. The perfect balance of extroversion and introversion, independence and reliance, cozy insides and rooftop access (well not technically). I can't imagine sharing it, leaving it, visiting it when it's not mine. It feels very foreign to prepare for a move but it is undoubtedly right. I have enjoyed the past 2 years in this place and for countless reasons I am thankful for it.

How many college girls get to live in a three-story brick house with separate apartments on each floor? A huge driveway so that friends can easily visit and a big backyard? Five roommates who are all in different walks of life and we love each other? Located right across the street from my school? Landlords that live next door and takes care of our yard, feeds us on occasion, and wants to know about our lives? And these qualities are all just icing on top of the cake compared to the memories that fill the house.

I will miss the current roommate dynamic that will never be the same no matter who is living in the house. I will miss being the dirty, crazy, weird little girl who just tried to make everyone laugh or snuggle. I will miss the spur-of-the-moment deep conversations that could happen everyday since we were in no hurry to leave. I will miss cooking together, using all three ovens in the house for Liz's baking adventures. I will miss the balcony and how it made everything more magical. I will miss our girly conversations filled with tears. I will miss China Fun and good beer. I will miss our dance parties and trying to introduce Liz to hip hop. I will miss our Christmas pictures. I will miss snow days and church at home. I will miss baby pool days in the sunshine. I will miss the feeling of excitement we feel when we're all six together. You ladies have no idea how important you are and always will be to me.

Thank you God for the gift of this house. I never thought that I would have a "normal" college experience, considering I went to community college for two years and all of my friends are older, but this house defined my college career. Thank you Mom & Dad for loving me, believing in me, and supporting me financially and emotionally so that I could live in this house and excel in school. I hope you are proud :) I love you very much.

A Dozen Glasses of Orange Juice

Father's Day is probably a rough (or perhaps meaningless) holiday to many people. Fatherlessness is way too common worldwide and I hurt for those who have not grown up with a father present or with a father that did not love them in the way that they ought to. I've seen the effects of fatherlessness in every single country that I've been to. On the flip side, I've really enjoyed spending time in thought this weekend about my relationship with my Dad. I'm imperfect, he's imperfect, and our relationship has been imperfect but we have continually moved forward. For that reason we are able to have a deep friendship along with our family ties. To all five of my readers out there (haha), let us not forget the importance of spending quality time with our families, whatever that looks to you. When we do this, time slows down and there is treasure in the simplicity.

Anyway, Happy Father's Day. This poem will be waiting for my daddio in the morning next to a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice :). Love you Daddio.

I am one of the lucky few

That can’t seem to remember

All of the ways her father loves her.

That can’t count the times

Her father has told her “I love you”.

That can’t recall a moment

When she did not sense her father’s commitment.

He has loved me every day since I was born,

Through my early and troublesome years,

And undoubtedly loves me more than ever today.

How can I possibly capture

The depth of his love

Or seize the frame of this picture?

 Perhaps it can be seen in a dozen glasses of orange juice.

You see,

There have been a dozen ordinary mornings

That a glass of orange juice has been waiting for me in the kitchen;

And I suddenly know that it is not an ordinary morning anymore

Or an ordinary glass of orange juice on the table.

I know that my father freshly squeezed this juice for me—

He chose the most ripe and sweet Florida oranges,

He used his favorite juicer and cleaned up the mess,

And he probably even scooped out the seeds

Because one time I complained about it.

His pride and joy in this simple little glass of orange juice

Makes the juice taste special.

It makes me feel special.

When I drink it I am reminded of the ways that my father loves me.

I am reminded that I am one of the lucky few

That sees a dozen glasses of orange juice

When she thinks of her father.

Immanuel Kant

"Two things fill the mind with ever new and increasing admiration and awe, the more often and steadily we reflect upon them: the starry sky above me and the moral law within me."

Speaking of "sky" (not to take away from the weight of the quote), I just realized the other day that with the increasingly warm weather I have more time to look at the sky now. It's my favorite part of creation and I like to think about it as God's canvas that he paints fresh every day. Some of my best moments of reflection have been situated in front of a rising or setting sun, cloudy shapes, and dewy colors of the sky. Don't pass it up.

Wandering Mind

Melodious dreams
Outside of reality
Floating me along.

In time some align,
But for now I remember
To keep open eyes.




Sunday paper-writing produces everything but a finished paper... even a double haiku. Twenty-one more days of writing and studying and I am finished! For a little while at least.

"Separation"

Your absence has gone through me
Like thread through a needle.
Everything I do is stitched with its color.

--W.S. Merwin 

Very beautiful poem.

61 Things That I Like...

...Because sometimes we have to be narcissistic and indulgent. This is a blog after all.


1. Purple ink pens.
2. Room temperature water.
3. Appreciating the beauty of earth.
4. Thoughtful acts of kindness (different from random acts of kindness).
5. A meal that starts at Smoothie King and ends at Chipotle or China Fun.
6. Oatmeal and bananas cooked together.
7. Sweet live music.
8. Pretending that I'm good at taking pictures.
9. Playing in the warm rain.
10. Earning A's or high remarks in school.
11. Dreaming.
12. Discovering new music.
13. Sharing the embarrassing/awkward stories of my life.
14. The feeling of inspiration and challenge.
15. When Tara and I compare each other to ugly animals.
16. Feeding birds from my window.
17. Drawing the same thing every time that I doodle--The sun and crazy patterns around it, or dinosaurs.
18. Realizing that Liz Schatz washed my mound of dishes for me... and she still loves me.
19. Realizing that my Dad cleaned my car for me... and he still loves me.
20. Realizing that I'm just not a very clean person... and dealing with it.
21. Bookmarking home design ideas on my computer that I'll hopefully use years and years from now.
22. Writing poems and then hating them, always.
23. Creating cards that people will keep forever, or at least for a year.
24. Saying "love meee".
25. Green Machine drink/ mixing my own veggie juices.
26. Coming home to my beautiful place and snuggling my roommates whether they like it or not.
27. Punching fear in the face.
28. Punching Ryan Taguding in the face.
29. Planning ANYTHING, but mostly fun trips.
30. "I can't believe I'm seeing this with my own eyes" moments (traveling).
31. Reading a newspaper on the floor of an airport.
32. Iced soy lattes.
33. Waking up at dawn and seeing the sun rise and the town wake up.
34. Picking out classes.
35. My growing family. Especially Dudley the dog.
36. My parents and their radiant souls.
37. My roof.
38. Salsa made from the garden.
39. Burping.
40. Putting on Kate's expensive rings that somehow look gangster on me and then doing my dance move.
41. When my roommates feed me.
42. Using dreams as poems.
43. Cursing in poems because no one will know.
44. Ice cream obviously.
45. Urban Outfitters.
46. Using typical phrases at the incorrect time. Such is life.
47. Sharing music with others.
48. Reading fun things.
49. Frozen mango halves.
50. Exotic or antique furniture/decorations.
51. Feeling freedom in the tension.
52. Replying to an email and accidentally sending it to everyone when I only meant to send it to one person... it's usually awkward.
53. 1 Corinthians 15:10
54. Listening and observing.
55. Learning about a country or nation.
56. Singing harmony.
57. My long, frizzy, wavy, crazy hair. I don't like to talk about it though.
58. Hats.
59. Reading old journal entries.
60. Expecting more from myself. Expecting more from you.
61. Being unconditionally loved and cared for physically, emotionally, spiritually. I'm spoiled on that one.
62. Delighting in the good, true, and beautiful.

Now, I would like to know yours.